I lost all the motivation. I feel burned out. I only have two weeks of school left, and there are going to be so many changes that I’m not prepared for. A lot of changes. It’s overwhelming. Academics, social life, changes, everything. It’s all very overwhelming, and I don’t know how to cope with it. I feel so stressed that I just want to escape reality. I still have work left to do for all of my classes. There is still a lot to do. But I don’t have any energy left.

I shouldn’t let my level of motivation nor my emotions affect my work ethic. It should be invariant to outside factors. It’s ok if I don’t love what I’m studying. I declared my majors, and I’m designing my path based on my decision. Regardless of whether the classes I’m taking right now are directly related to my major or not, I should complete my tasks for them. Don’t worry about getting all the details right, don’t worry about understanding all the tiny things. As long as I get the tasks done, it’s enough. As long as I finish what I’m supposed to do, it’s enough. It’s measurable, and it’s concrete. It’s how things are in my software development class, and it might be a good idea to model my lifestyle after that. An agile process. My work, my life involves completing tasks that are administrative as well. Reply to messages, reply to emails, promptly. No matter how small or big, consider it my duty.

9 to 6 is a regular work schedule. I should do that. I should try to complete as many tasks as possible between the given time, and call it the day afterwards. I’ll use the rest of the time for myself. For developing the skills that I want to develop, for being closer to who I want to be. Within the designated time, I should try to make concrete, relevant tasks, and get them done. Instead of “taking notes”, or “organizing notes”, make it “finish pset 5, finish pset 2”. Getting the job done is the most important thing. Separate work me from me me. My work during that time is getting good grades and getting the work done. My duty in my civ class is to participate. Make it 8 to 7.

Make it work. Make realistic plans, and stick to it.